wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize