Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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