yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize
