Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Please don't give away my fajitas
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
