remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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