Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
