I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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