i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Randomize
