She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
