Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
