people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
