dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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