I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize