While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
