I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
