Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
