Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
