Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
