he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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