awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
