R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
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