R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
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