ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
