when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
