Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
