garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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