I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
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