i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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