whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
