theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize