In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize