Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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