i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
