You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
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