I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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