And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Randomize