Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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