these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Randomize
