oh god the rape fog is back!
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
