big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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