My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
my liver is dry heaving
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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