I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
