:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize