I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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