I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
