i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize
