Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I want her autograph on my taint
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
