Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize