You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
