I swear she didn't look like that last week.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
